Every November in Quebec, the spotlight turns to a reality that keeps many parents up at night : teenage runaways.
As a parent of a teen, it’s easy to think it only happens to others. However, running away doesn’t just happen in the movies — it’s a real-life crisis, often triggered by deep distress; that exposes youth to serious dangers, from exploitation to homelessness.
Runaway Prevention Month reminds us of one simple but crucial truth: communication and prevention are key.
Beyond the “teen crisis”: The real reasons behind running away
When a teen runs away, it’s rarely on a whim. It’s usually a cry for help. The reasons are complex and often rooted in family dynamics or personal struggles :
- The wall of misunderstanding: Does your teen feel like you don’t listen? Strict rules or lack of dialogue can lead to feelings of suffocation.
- Mental health at stake: Anxiety, depression, or other disorders are powerful triggers for the distress that leads to running away.
- Challenging family situations: Constant conflict, violence, or even feeling “invisible” at home are major risk factors.
- External dangers: Negative peer influence or risky online encounters can make teens believe a “better life” awaits elsewhere.
November encourages us to break the silence and address these issues before they reach a breaking point.
5 tips for effective prevention at home
Prevention isn’t a one-time conversation. It’s a daily commitment. Here are a few practical tips for parents:
- Put your phone down and really listen: Create distraction-free moments to talk. Active, non-judgmental listening is key. Validate their emotions, even if you don’t fully understand their reasoning.
- Set up a “safety code”: Establish clear rules around outings, friends, and curfews. More importantly, create a “Plan B” with your teen: “If you’re in danger or scared, call me — no matter the time or situation. I’ll come get you, no questions asked in the moment.”
- Keep an eye on their online activities: Knowing their online friends is just as important as knowing their school friends. Talk about the risks of meeting people through social media.
- Spot subtle signs: Sudden changes in friends, falling grades, isolation, persistent sadness, or excessive screen time are red flags. Never hesitate to seek professional help if you’re concerned.
- Be their safe person: Your teen needs to know that, despite arguments, you’re their ultimate safety net.
Resources at your fingertips
You don’t have to carry this burden alone. Quebec has many resources for parents and teens:
- Missing Children’s Network : Essential support in cases of disappearance — and for prevention too.
- Jeunesenfugue.ca: A great tool with advice for both teens and parents.
- Ligne Parents (1-800-263-5080): A valuable listening and support service for parents.
- Tel-Jeunes (1-800-263-2266): Available by phone, text, or chat for teens who need to talk to someone neutral.